I admit I was pretty proud of myself when I charted a 55-pound weight loss at the five-month mark (March 5). I quickly lost sight of that accomplishment, however, as the rest of that month wore on and March turned into April…and the six-month anniversary – and one month after I was so happy to reach that 55-pound mark – I had only added another two-pound weight loss to the total.
How quickly a major accomplishment can lose its luster.
What had taken me months of hard work, resilience, commitment, sacrifice, attitude and lifestyle changes, and grit to achieve was all of a sudden not good enough.
I compared myself to a truck stuck in the mud spinning its tires and not getting anywhere.
There is no denying that often our worst enemy is right smack dab in front of us – all we need to do is look in the mirror and there it is staring right at us. So what do we do? We (often) let it demean, degrade and chastise us into believing something that isn’t true. Instead, what would happen if we stared it down and challenged it? Dared it to back off? Demanded that it offer encouragement and support? Provoked it to have your back during the toughest part of the fight? Summoned its inner knowledge to provide stamina, strength and strategy?
Don’t underestimate the depths of your own personal strength. Without struggles, fatigue and questions we don’t – and won’t – grow and evolve.
Nope, it isn’t easy. Would we really want it to be? We say we do, but really? We would have very little, if anything, of which to be proud. We wouldn’t even realize we had accomplished anything of merit.
This month? Yeah, I’m still swinging like a pendulum. Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.
It’s frustrating as He**.
But I’m moving. Physically, mentally, psychologically.
And I’m still miles ahead of where I was such a short time ago.
I may not be making progress at the same pace as I was in the beginning, but I have not failed.
No one has ever gotten anywhere by standing still.